Raising Beasy Boy Doom Patrol Style!
by Strix Moonwing
Summary: For the first time ever you the readers are going read the about the people who we can blame...I mean thank for making Beast Boy the way he is today..Dun da du..The Doom Patrol! See the pains, suffering,and more pain they went through and laugh out loud a
1. Chapter 1

**Raising Beast Boy! (Doom Patrol Style)!**

**By Strix Moonwing**

**Strix Moonwing (me): Hi! Remember me? You problay heard or read about me in my other story Bye Bye Robin. I was at a writer's block on the Bye Bye Robin story so I decided to write the first chapter to this story while I'm thinking about the other one. Don't worry I won't forget Bye Bye Robin! **

**Summary: We all know Beast Boy. He's the cute, funny shape-shifter of the Teen Titans team right? But how did he get that way! I am going to show you the people we can blame…I mean thank for making BB the way he is! The Doom Patrol!**

**Strix: I do not own TT or the Doom Patrol or BB's cute little mask.**

**Chapter 1: How Beast Boy Learned History!**

**Note: Beast Boy is about six, seven, or eight in these chapters.**

Our story begins at the DP headquarters. Do not ask me where it is because I have no clue. Negative Man has been called on for a very important mission that is so secret and so life threatening that I get goose bumps even thinking about it.

"YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT!" Cried Negative Man at Mento.

"Yes I want you to teach Beast Boy American History." Said Mento folding his arms in a stubborn way.

"But why?"

"Why! Why! You ask me why! Because every kid should get the chance to learn about how this country was formed. He should learn about how our fore fathers fought to gain our country liberty! Why every kid should….. (Goes on and on with patriotic speech all while an American flag is flying in the background)…And that Negative Man is why our flag has 13 stripes! Negative Man?

(Negative Man asleep on a chair) "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ…Oh right! Apple pie…flag…whatever. Why can't Elastic Girl or Robotman teach him?

"Because she's going on a date with me and Robotman's an idiot!"

"Right, I forgot. But why Beast Boy!"

"Aww! Come on! He isn't that bad! Look there he is now!

Beast Boy comes skipping down the hallway humming. "I had a cookie. Then I ate one and then I had none!" (Yay SpongeBob!)

"I'm going to get you for this."

**Lesson 1….America**

Beast Boy and a very depressed Negative Man (NM for short) were sitting down in the DP living room starting their…lesson.

"Okay Beast Boy soooooo how much American History do you know?"

"I don't know….Uh Larry."

"It's Negative Man!"

"Yes Larry Negative Man Sir!"

"Forget it! So what is it?"

"What's America?"

"America is the place we live."

"I thought we lived in the Doom Lair."

"That's different. America is the country we live in."

"Don't we live a city? (Get it…country…city…you know…farms in the country…forget it.)"

"No! A country is a big piece of land that races of people live at….Like we're from America so we're Americans."

"But I from Africa! Does that mean I'm not an American?"

"Uhhhhh….I think that means you're African."

"You mean I'm not in the right country! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I want to be in my right country! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I'm going to find my rightful country! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah! Cried Beast Boy running to his room.

"Well that could have turned out better." Said NM. Then Robotman walked by.

"Hey Larry any reason Beast Boy's in his room sealing himself in a cardboard box that's labeled to go to Africa?"

**Lesson 2….Starting the learning**

After NM had got BB out of the box going to Africa, and had convinced him that America is home for all races of people not just people who were born here, they started on their second lesson. The first thing they had to do was find some history material.

"Okay there has to be some history books here or something…." Said NM as he looked on shelves and desks. Then BB ran up to him holding a cereal box.

"Look! Look! I found History-Os!" cried BB grinning as he held up the cereal box for NM to see.

"History what?" said NM as he looked at the cover of the cereal box. Indeed it did have the word History-Os is big colorful print. The box had a goofy picture of George Washington and Napoleon on it.

"Where'd you find this?" asked NM.

"It was on TV!" cried BB pointing to the TV. A commercial came on and stupid music cheery music came on._ "Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy…History-Os! Now with marshmallows shaped like George Washington, Napoleon, and Pearl Harbor! And on the back of each box they have historical facts! (warning: facts may not be historical right) Buy…History-Os!_" Then the commercial ended.

"May we pleaseeeeeeeeeeee get some!" cried Beast Boy giving NM the face except since he's only like six or seven it's ten times more cuter.

"Well…..it did say it had facts on the back (he didn't catch the last part)…I guess we came get some if it's about your education."

"Yayyyyyyyy! To the store!"

**Strix: Well that's the end of my first chapter for this series…don't worry there'll be more! I really hope you like it so for! If you have any ideas for the story I'll read it in the reviews and try to put it on. Please review!**


	2. How Beast Boy learned History2

**Raising Beast Boy! (Doom Patrol Style)!**

**By Strix Moonwing**

**Strix Moonwing (me): Hi guys! I'm back! With the second chapter of Raising Beast Boy! Thanks for all the reviews! This one is going to be the second part of the first chapter. Hope you like it!**

**StarfireK: Strix Moonwing does not own TT or the Doom Patrol…but she does own History-Os! (Theme song starts playing)_ Oh History-Os, Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy….History-Os!_**

**Strix: Uh…..nice StarK.**

**StarK: Thanks! (Starts drinking a Capri sun)**

**Chapter 2: How Beast Boy learned History part 2**

Last time we checked Beast Boy and Negative Man were going to buy some History-Os! (Theme song starts playing)

_**Oh History-Os, Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy…History-Os!**_

"Okay who keeps doing that?" cried NM, glaring at the ceiling.

**In a land far, far away…**

The camera shows a 14-year old girl typing on the computer. "Muwauuuuuuhhaaaaahaaaa! Sing History-Os! Sing!" laughed Strix. Then she realized that there was a camera in the room. "Who's taping this? Cyborg! Is that you? (Shows the camera backing away quickly) "Come back here!"(The camera is dropped on the ground, but is still on and it shows Cyborg being strangled by Strix)

**Back to BB and NM…**

The two soon make it to Wal-mart in hopes of getting some History-Os without any trouble….wrong! Muwaaaahhhhhaaaaaahhhaaaas!

"Ohhhhhhh Larry! Look! Buggies! Could we get one! Pleaseeeeeeee!" cried BB making the face.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt...and don't call me Larry! It's Negative Man!" said Larry…I mean Negative Man. BB jumped with joy and ran to get one.

"Uhhhh….which one? Which one?" said Beast Boy to himself? He pulled one out and pushed it around. He decided that it squeaked too much. He then got out another one. It didn't roll right.

"Just pick one all ready!" cried NM.

"But none of these feel right!" cried Beast Boy. Then his face brightened. "Found one!"

"Thank god!" Thought NM. He then saw BB riding toward him on an electric wheel chair.

"Look how cool it is! You don't even have to push it!" cried Beast Boy overjoyed at this discovering. Suddenly an old lady came running them with her cane waving in the air.

"Oh snap…." And with that NM grabbed a real buggy and BB and ran away has fast as he could with an old lady right behind them.

**Later….**

After hiding in the cloths rack from the old lady for two hours. The two finally made their way to the cereal area.

"Hey Larry…I mean Negative Man?" asked Beast Boy looking up at NM.

"What is it Garfield?" asked NM in a bored voice.

"Uhhhhh….I was wondering….can I ride in the buggy?" cried BB, his whole face lit with happiness.

"No!" cried NM, who was already tired.

"Please! Please! Please! Please! Please!" Cried Beast Boy making the face.

"No! No! No! And that won't work on me so don't try it!" shouted NM.

Poor Negative Man….if he would have ever had to baby sit a little kid before, he would have know that if asking nicely doesn't work, and then when pretending to be sad doesn't work, a kid only has one thing to do….and they aren't afraid to do it. Yes, my fellow baby-sitters, they throw one heck of a tantrum!

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaa! I WANT TO RIDE IN THE BUGGY! WAAAAHHHHHHAAHHHH! I WANT TO RIDE IN THE BUGGY! Cried Beast Boy, leaking big tears.

"Stop crying those big crocodile tears!" shouted NM. It didn't help that BB had turned in to a crocodile.

"Stop screaming! Garfield!" cried NM who was now getting angry.

Beast Boy then held his breath. And he kept holding it. And holding it. And holding it….Okay at this point he had turned blue. NM grew worried and gave up.

"Fine you can ride in the buggy." Sighed NM. Beast Boy then gave him a smile that would melt Slade's heart.

"Thank you Larry! You're the best!" cried BB, hugging NM then jumping on the buggy.

"Yeah, whatever." Muttered NM. They were now in the cereal area. "Finally! There's the History-Os!" Suddenly music comes on on the speakers. **_Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go? To the store to buy…History-Os!_**

"I'm really starting to hate that song." Said Larry. He and Beast Boy, not knowing how many boxes they would need, took all of them and headed home.

**At The Doom Patrol Headquarters….**

NM and BB stood in the kitchen with a box of History-Os in their hands. Larry looked at front and back of the box and frowned. Beast Boy just smiled as usual.

"Okay….so now what?" asked NM.

"We look on the back! That's what the commercial said!" cried Beast Boy, pointing at the back of the box. Larry turned the box over and read it.

After he was done, he threw the box on the table. "What a piece of crp!" shouted NM.

"Ohhhhhhh….I never heard that word before! Crp!" Cried Beast Boy happily. "It tinkles my tongue!"

"DO I HEAR FOUL LANGUAGE IN MY DORMAIN!" shouted Mento from in the hallway.

"Oh (dolphin sounds)!" cried NM.

"Oh! I never heard that word before either!" cried Beast Boy even happy that he had discovered the joy of a new word. NM grabbed BB and they hid in the food cabinet to hide from Mento. In there they found Robotman (aka Cliff) crouch over a bowl of History-Os. There was a large pile of empty cereal behind him. Larry stared at Cliff in disbelief.

"Cliff….did you eat all of our boxes of History-Os?" asked Larry.

Cliff shifted his eyes guiltily. "Uhhhhhh….I can explain!" Suddenly the song we all know by now came on.

"**_Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy….History-Os!"_**

"That's it!" shouted Larry. He shot that shadow body….thingy…attack all around the cabinet. The cabinet then exploded due to it. The only thing left of the cabinet was Larry, Beast Boy, Cliff, and a bunch of empty cereal boxes. Something then fell from the ceiling and landed on Negative Man's head.

It was broken CD player. On the back it said property of Strix Moonwing. It let out one more turn before it broke. **_History…Os…..Go…..Oooooooo!_** Beast Boy smiled and dusted some broken wood off himself.

"Well that wasn't so bad. And look….we still have the cereal boxes!" cried Beast Boy happily. He was cut off by a loud yell.

"DID I HEAR A LOUD AND DESTRUCTIVE EXPLODION FROM WITHIN MY DOMAIN!" yelled Mento.

"OH (dolphin sounds)!" Cried Larry and Cliff, grabbing Beast Boy and running out the room.

"Hey! I never heard that word either!"

**Later…In the Doom Patrol Living Room…**

After reading a lot of the backs of cereal boxes and a lot of pain and yelling, Negative Man was finally ready to give Beast Boy the history lesson he had been waiting for. First lesson….American History.

Beast Boy was sitting on the couch when NM walked in dressed up like a colonist from the American Revolution. (The Americans were called colonist) Then Robotman came in dressed like King George the third. NM cleared his throat and began.

"Okay….Garfield….today we learn about the American Revolution. Okay…ahem…Hello! I am Sam Adams! Leader of the Sons of Liberty! And we…"

"Drink tea you filthy American!" shouted Robotman, pouring tea on NM.

"Ow! Ow! That's hot! What are you doing Cliff! This isn't part of the script!" cried Larry.

"Muewaaaahhaaaaahhhhhaaaa! I am your king! You must do has I say! And I say drink tea!" shouted Cliff pouring more tea on Larry.

"Okay that's it! No more mister nice American! Revolution!" shouted Larry, grabbing an American flag and started hitting Cliff on the head with it.

"Wow! The American Revolution is awesome!" shouted Beast Boy clapping his hands with delight.

Later after they were done fighting the American Revolution, Larry thought it was best to start world history now. So Larry came back into the living room dressed up as George Washington, and Cliff came in dressed like Napoleon.

"Okay…I am George Washington! I fought in the French and Indian War and in the American Revolu…."

"You think that's good, well I conquered half of Europe!" shouted Cliff.

"Napoleon! Right now we are talking about me! Not you!" shouted Larry.

"Oh hey! Well I can beat your army anytime, anywhere!" shouted Cliff.

"Yeah right!"

"How about at Pearl Harbor!"

"What the heck are you talking about!"

"I call for battle!"

"What?"

"Attack!"

Larry had no time to act or think before Cliff jumped on him and beat him to a pulp.

"Haha! I am victorious! Now to call in for the final attack! Bring in the bomb!" shouted Cliff. Mento then came in dressed like an airplane and threw a water balloon (or bomb) and it hit Larry.

"Victory is my!) Shouted Cliff running around like a maniac. Beast Boy started clapping at the performance.

**Later…..**

It was Beast Boy's bedtime and Elastic-Girl (aka Rita) went to say good-night to him.

"So Mento told me that Larry and Cliff taught you some history today! What did you learn?" asked Rita, smiling at him.

Beast Boy smiled at her and said, "Well…I learned that King George the third made all the colonists drink nasty tea and that made them do a revolution and also that George Washington was beat by Napoleon at Pearl Harbor!"

Rita was silent for a minute. Then she smiled and went out the door. Beast Boy fell to sleep before he could hear the scream that said, "WHAT THE HECK HAVE YOU BEEN TEACHING MY SON!"

**Strix: I hoped you liked the second chapter to this series! Don't worry the next one is going to be how Beast Boy first got a video game! Review!**


	3. Beastboy's first Video Game!

**Raising Beast Boy (Doom Patrol Style)!**

**By Strix Moonwing**

**Strix: Hi guys! Sorry for the long wait for the next chapter…I've been trying to update all of my old stories as well as some new ones lately. Since you've all been waiting I'll skip the intro and go right to the story. Hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans, the Doom Patrol, or the Danny Phantom theme.**

**Chapter three: Beast Boy's First Video Game**

"Larry, may I have two hundred bucks?" asked Beast boy, holding out his hand toward Larry, who was currently watching some TV. It had been two weeks since the whole Mento-hires-NM-to-teach-Beast-boy-history-but-totally-screws-up-and-now-Beast-boy-will-never-grow-up-to-be-a-professor-or teacher-or-something-that-you-actually-get-paid-for-instead-of-living-in-a-tower-shaped-like-a-T-with-a-bunch-of-sugar-crazed-teenagers incident and things had gone back to normal…and NM had recovered from the fury of Elastic Girl.

"That depends…is it out of curiosity or do you want it?" Asked NM, still looking at the TV screen.

"That depends…is it out of curiosity or are you going to give it to me?" asked Beast Boy, in the same tone NM had used.

NM glared at him and said, "What do I look like? A bank!"

Beast Boy smiled and said, "Well….you didn't look like a history teacher either, but that didn't stop you."

NM slapped his hand over his face and muttered, "Okay, when did you become such a smart mouth?"

"Robotman gave me lessons."

"Oh, he can give you lessons in smart mouth and yet he can't teach you one ounce of history?" NM said, glaring.

Beast Boy shrugged and said, "Well you couldn't either Larry."

Larry sighed and said, "My name's Negative man! Not Larry…that goes for you too, Strix!" Larry…er…I mean…Negative man said shaking his fist at the ceiling, which was stupid because everyone knows a writer always stands behind their characters while typing a story. Duh!

Beast Boy stared at Larry(Negative Man, Strix!) with a look of confusion and then asked, "Sooooo…can I have the money?"

"What does a kid like you need two hundred bucks for?" asked NM, questionably.

Beast Boy closed his eyes and said, in a professional voice, "When life gives you questions turn to the TV!" And with that Beast Boy grabbed the remote control from NM and changed the channel.

On the channel was a commercial, but not just any commercial. It was…..

"NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!" Cried NM, covering his eyes and hiding behind the couch in fear.

Yes, it was a commercial of….HISTORY-Os! THE GAME! Cue the theme song!

Theme song: **_Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! _**

_**When you need to learn history, where do you go?**_

_**To the store to buy…History-Os!**_

Of course….that was old theme song. For the new and improved History-Os video game they had to mix it up a little.

New Theme song: (it has the beat of the original Danny Phantom theme)

**_When you need to learn history what do you get? Hi-Hi-History-Os_**

_**A cereal that's so strange!**_

_**With history rearranged!**_

_**A theme song so deranged!**_

_**When you need to learn history what do you get? Hi-Hi-History-Os!**_

_**Those idiots don't stand a chance!**_

_**When their brains all enhanced!**_

_**With knowledge so advance!**_

_**When you need to learn history what do you get? Hi-Hi-History-Os!**_

_**You're going to be taught it all!**_

_**From US and World history!**_

_**Sing this theme**_

_**Until your whole family screams!**_

**_When you need to learn history what do you get? Hi-Hi-History-Os….THE GAME! Word!_**

For many seconds, Negative Man could only stare at the screen with look of confusion, shock, and disbelief. At last he said, "Oh. My. Gosh. I can't believe it…they've turned the song that used to annoy me so much into a rap that will drive me to the end of my sanity in the next hour."

"I know! Isn't it great?" cried Beast Boy, gleefully. "So can I have it?"

"To buy that piece of (censored)? Forget it!" said NM.

Beast Boy laughed and said, "Hahahha! You said that word again!"

Suddenly Mento's voice could be heard. "DID I HEAR BAD LANGUAGE IN MY DOMAIN!"

"Not this again!" cried NM, grabbing Beast Boy, who was still giggling, and running out of the room.

**Later….**

"So he didn't give you the money, uh kid?" asked Robotman to Beast Boy. Beast Boy had come into the garage to watch Robotman make repairs to himself.

"No, and I don't understand why!" cried Beast boy, sitting on the wing of the Doom Jet, his feet hanging over the edge.

"Did you make him listen to the rap?"

"Yes!"

"And he still said no? I can't believe it! Everyone loves a good rap!" cried Robotman.

Beast boy nodded. "I know! Maybe you should have given me more smart mouth lessons."

Robotman rubbed his metal chin, thoughtfully, "I don't think the smart mouth lessons are going to help get you that video game. I know! What about a job?"

Beast Boy blinked in surprise. "A job? But I already have a job. I'm part of the Doom Patrol!"

Robotman laughed and said, "Being part of the Doom Patrol isn't a job! You get paid for doing work in a job."

Beast Boy raised an eyebrow, confused. "You mean you don't get paid? But NM and Elastic-girl get paid every Friday!"

Robotman stopped laughing. "You mean we do get paid? WHY HAVEN'T I BEEN PAID?"

"Because you never asked?" said Beast boy like it was the most oblivious thing in the world.

"WHAT? WHY THAT NO GOOD, SON OF A…." Robotman let out a long string of cuss words, while Beast Boy just looked confused.

"Uhhh…Cliff, what does (censor), (censor) and (censor) mean?"

**Much later…..**

NM, Robotman, and Beast boy were lying on the floor in the living room, looking at newspaper ads, each trying to find Beast Boy a job…without Mento or Elastic girl knowing.

"Oh here's one!" cried Robotman, holding up a newspaper add. "There's a job at the mall for someone who is small and green to play an elf! That's the perfect job for you!"

"That's a Christmas ad you dimwit!" shouted NM. "It's July!"

Robotman, looking disappointed, got out another and brightened up. "Oh! This one is for someone to play in Star Trek!"

NM glared at Robotman and said, "Cliff do you really thing they'd get someone like Beast Boy to be an actor in Star Trek?"

"What he looks just like an alien!"

"And you look like a car that's been in the monster truck rally but you don't see me bringing you into the local dump!"

"Hey! I don't see you coming up with any ideas!"

"Well, unlike you, I'm thinking over my opinions!"

"They're not your opinions! They're for Beast Boy!"

"Oh shut it Tin man!"

"You shut it!"

"No you!"

"You!"

"You!"

While the two battled on their never ending battle, Beast Boy was currently looking a black and purple magazine that said, in very sinister handwriting, **"Villain's Schemes"**

Beast boy looked at the back of the magazine and saw a job add. As he read it, a giant smile slowly spread over his face. He had found his new job.

Without another word, the green kid torn out the ad and walked away from the two bickering adults and headed one step closer to getting his new video game.

**Strix: Hehehe…I'm so insane! I hoped you liked my new History-Os theme song! It's based off the first Danny Phantom theme(which they didn't put in the show). This one is going to be a three part. I hope you like it! Please review!**


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